How to talk to your child about emotions?

Children experience various situations with much greater intensity than adults—it's completely natural. Emotions are like an inner compass for all of us, revealing what's important, what moves us, and what we need. How can you talk about them to support your child and convey what's most important? Learn how you can connect with your child at different stages of development.

It is worth (and necessary) to talk about emotions

Talking about emotions from an early age supports the development of a child's emotional intelligence. It teaches them to recognize, name, and manage their emotions. Children who can talk about their feelings find it easier to navigate relationships, are more empathetic, and have greater mental resilience.

Wondering how to talk to your child about emotions so you can truly hear and be heard? We've got some tips!

Start with yourself – show that emotions are not a taboo subject

A child learns through observation. If they see you say, "I'm tired today, I need a moment of peace," or "I'm sad because our trip was canceled," they learn that emotions are natural. They don't need to be ashamed of them, and they don't need to be suppressed.

You can use so-called didactic emotion boards – colorful cards with facial expressions depicting various emotional states. You can mark how you feel every day. This is a great starting point for conversation, especially with younger children.

How to Talk About Emotions? Above all, listen and don't judge.

Your child doesn't need a lecture, just a space to express their feelings. When they say, "I don't want to go to preschool," instead of replying, "Stop whining, you like Mrs. Kasia!", it's better to ask, "What happened today that made you not want to go?" This way, you'll show them that their feelings are important to you and that you care about understanding the reason they're feeling this way.

It's worth having something on hand to help relieve tension during difficult conversations – for example, a plush toy that will help illustrate sadness and joy, or sensory anti-stress balls that you can squeeze during the conversation.

Don't be afraid of "difficult" words

Anger, jealousy, shame – these are emotions that can be uncomfortable. Pretending they're not there won't magically make them disappear, however. Instead of saying, "You can't get angry!", it's better to say, "I see you're angry. What happened?" This way, children learn that emotions are okay to experience – as long as they're safe for themselves and others.

Books about emotions are a helpful tool! Among the bestsellers, you'll find titles like The Colored Monster , the Gucia Feelings series, and Kitty-Cat Gets Angry . These are simple, beautifully illustrated stories that help children (and adults!) understand themselves.

How to talk to a teenager about emotions?

A teenager usually won't rush into your arms crying when something is bothering them. They'll likely hide in their room with their favorite music blasting, or they might confide in a friend or acquaintance. So, you need to be patient and choose a slightly different approach.

How to have a low-pressure conversation? You don't have to sit down for a "serious" conversation. Instead, invite your teen to cook, drive, or clean with you. Make sure to create a space where there's no room for judgment. It's better to ask, " What did you find difficult? " than to flatly state, " You're overreacting. "

Tip: Encourage your teen to keep an emotion journal, which they can manage independently. You can also look for special sets of conversation cards that make it easier to start difficult topics.

How to talk about emotions in everyday situations?

Don't wait for a crisis! It's worth naming emotions in ordinary moments, when your child is performing various tasks, encountering disappointments, successes, and failures. For example, "I'm so glad you managed to do it on your own!" or "I see you're disappointed—that's normal; everyone feels that way sometimes." Sometimes, just one sentence is enough to show your child that you fully understand them.

What accessories will be useful when talking and working with emotions?

• emotion cards – help you name what is most deeply rooted inside and what is most difficult to define;
• sensory aids – used for calming down and self-regulation;
• Creative kits – sometimes crayons, paper, and modeling clay are all you need. It's easier to convey emotions through creative expression! Also check out our suggestions for creative projects you can do with your child;
• cuddly toys and pillows in the shape of emotions – they help in managing anxiety and stress;
• magnetic boards or mood calendars – they teach planning and consciously experiencing various emotions.

Talking about emotions doesn't always have to be completely serious. It can be warm, light, and sometimes funny. The most important thing is to recognize that it's incredibly necessary – because it helps your child learn to talk about themselves, understand others, and build secure relationships. And you will be their best guide on this journey!

Wondering how to talk to your child about emotions to truly reach their heart? Start with what you have most precious – time, attention, and closeness.